Most people are aware of the high divorce rate in America. The divorce rate when the wife becomes chronically ill, often soars to twice the national average. Since men tend to be “fixers” and they are unable to “fix “their wives, sometimes they take the easy way out and abandon them. People are shocked when they find out that I married Sherri after she had become ill. I always tell them, I married Sherri—not her illness. Besides, I wanted to get the “worse” and “sickness” part of our marriage started so I could look forward to the “best” and “health” part. Although Sherri will probably never be healthy until Jesus takes her home, God has allowed me to be content despite her illness and He has definitely been my strength. Sherri is an awesome lady and God has blessed her with true beauty, both physically and spiritually. I have been blessed to share in her triumphs and sufferings.

Marriage in and of itself takes much time and effort. Toss in a chronic illness and everything is an issue – from being able to enjoy activities together, to increasing medical bills, to just trying to keep the house running. Because we have a single income due to Sherri’s inability to work, and ever increasing medical bills, lack of finances is probably the biggest struggle. Since she can rarely cook we have the added expense of regularly eating out as well.

We cannot enjoy things that bring many couples closer like dancing, biking or camping. Often we are unable to attend family gatherings or social events. It is difficult to connect with other couples and form friendships. I love to go to concerts and plays, but it is extremely painful for Sherri to sit in one spot for more than fifteen minutes; and since she was a music theatre major, these events can send her into a depression. We’ve also missed out on being able to have and raise children. I even have to handle most of the chores myself which when both spouse are healthy are shared. It is a constant struggle just to keep the house somewhat clean.

My faith in God and my love for Sherri are the two things that keep me going through the tough times. As I rely more and more on Christ, I have learned that in order for me to be like Christ, I must love my wife as Christ loved the church and that was unto death. Also, being Christ like is to suffer as he did. I have found that suffering is the only way we can grow in our spiritual lives. When things are going well we just coast and become complacent. When tough times come our way we have to turn to Christ, because in our weakness He is strong.

As men, we must allow Christ to be the center of our lives and we must lead our families and our marriages by being servants. We must focus on our relationship with our wife and not what we can or can’t do anymore due to our wife’s illness. Yes, it can be overwhelming, but scripture says we are not to lean on our own understanding but to rely are Christ. I hear people say that God won’t give you any thing you can’t handle. Well, this scripture, 1 Corinthians 10:13, really says that God will always give us a way out of temptation—not about what we can handle. God allows all kinds of situations in our lives, which we can’t handle in order to drive us to Him. Only through Christ can we do all things.

Growing up in a broken home with an abusive stepfather, I learned to rely on God when times were tough. I also learned compassion; to come alongside hurting people, offering a kind word and a hug. Being sensitive to other’s needs has helped me tremendously when dealing with Sherri’s illness and pain. By instinct, when we are in public I know when she needs a chair or when she has had enough and needs a break. I have noticed that I am aware of other people who are hurting and their immediate needs as well.

Our society can be frustrating because everyone is so focused on “success” that we forget about those who are in need. We become so “busy” that we often don’t have time for God, family, friends and especially someone who is hurting on a long-term basis. However, Sherri’s illness has caused us to reprioritize our lives, so it has given us a perspective of what is important and what real “success” in life is all about. It has driven us to a deeper compassion for those who are suffering.

Finally, even though it seems I have it all together and I might even think that myself in regards to our marriage and Sherri’s illness, I do fail often. When she is crying out and needs a gentle touch, I tend to only think about my needs. The great thing though is that as our marriage has progressed, I have become more aware of her needs and less of my wants. My prayer has been to be a servant to her and God has been answering it in the last few years. I have to remember that I am commanded to love my wife no matter what and with God’s help, I will.

Copyright 2005 – Wayne Connell – Founder of Where Is God Ministries and the Invisible Disabilities Association

The above question has probably been asked, in some form or another, by every disabled individual. Being disabled can often cause a great deal of internal anger and animosity directed at God. Is this normal? I personally believe it, by all means, is! Having these feelings is part of the human need to place blame. Often there is no one to place blame on and so internally we direct our anger at the Lord. Dealing with that anger is very difficult to accomplish. That is why we, all too often, ask the question: “God, have you abandoned me?”

It is so difficult to give an easy answer to such questions. The only thing we can say is that God NEVER abandons us, even though we feel as though he has. I’m certain that Bible characters like Job and Jeremiah often wondered if God had “plugged His ears” to their cries of pain. In reality, Jesus became the “all hearing ears” of God and He does hear our cries! Just not always answering our cries, the way, we would like him to. Dr. Charles Stanley, of “In Touch Ministries” explains it best with his description of the four “frontiers” where every suffering person will do battle: the frontiers of fear, helplessness, meaning, and hope. Our response to suffering depends largely on the outcome of our struggle in those frontiers. I think we all have experienced those four “frontiers” in some detail, but those of us that suffer disabilities have probably experienced them in greater detail than the rest of the Church.

I often get extensive comfort from the writings of the Apostle Paul and one of my favorite passages, in regards to pain and suffering, is found in 2 Corinthians 1:1-11 (NKJV):

(1) Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, and Timothy our brother, To the church of God which is at Corinth, with all the saints who are in all Achaia. (2) Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. (3) Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, (4) who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. (5) For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. (6) Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation. (7) And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation. (8) For we do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, of our trouble which came to us in Asia: that we were burdened beyond measure, above strength, so that we despaired even of life. (9) Yes, we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves but in God who raises the dead, (10) who delivered us from so great a death, and does deliver us; in whom we trust that He will still deliver us, (11) you also helping together in prayer for us, that thanks may be given by many persons on our behalf for the gift granted to us through many.

My own disability has driven me into this feeling of “anger and animosity” nearly destroying me. This deep seeded anger stayed with me for more than 15 years. Who is vulnerable to these feelings of anger? Personally, I am convinced that we are ALL vulnerable! I was a Pastor when I became very ill and I lost everything due to my illness. I lost my wife and daughter, which was my fault, but I blamed God. I incurred medical bills in excess of $800,000, for which I blamed God and I totally lost my ability to work, for which I also blamed God.

The end result was I sealing myself in a shell of anger and hate all directed at the Lord. I lived there in the same community from 1984 to 1995 and during that period, of nearly 11 years, I never had a single Pastor, or any Christian for that matter, try to visit me. Even more disturbing was the fact that I probably had 30 friends who were pastors! That is a sad state of affairs for the modern local Church.

I’ve often been asked: “Don’t you believe in the awesome power of God’s ability to heal?” I most certainly do! But, unfortunately, there are far more incidents of suffering and illness, than divine healing. God simply hasn’t chosen for me to be healed yet, and he may never choose to heal me. This world is a world of “discord” and has been since the beginning of time. God placed man into this environment due to man’s association with “sin” and that’s where all pain and suffering originated. Jesus, himself, suffered much and we continue to experience suffering and pain due to the sin nature of man.

Jesus is still the “Healer” but he uses us, the Body of Christ, as his instrument to hold a hand, give us a hug, kneel beside our bed and pray, or to simply offer us an encouraging word when we are struggling. Unfortunately, all too often, the Church is failing in the Ministry of comfort to those who are hurting. The world is full of individuals who experience pain and suffering everyday of their lives, and they desperately need someone to be there and that someone is you and I! This pain and suffering eventually, in many cases, leads us to seek the Almighty in a more profound way, than ever before. At least, it did me and I praise him for bringing me to this point of desperation where I returned to him, and he received me with open arms!

I am going to end with a few quotes of some divine individuals who have made a profound impact on modern day thinking in regards to the subject of suffering and the ability to deal with it.

In seeking God’s power, I discovered his person. He is not just omnipotent; he is also the God of all comfort. And taking us through suffering, not out of it, is one of the primary means that the Spirit uses today in bringing us to God.” –Daniel Wallace, in “Christianity Today”, September 12 1994

“Don’t look forward to the day you stop suffering, because when it comes you’ll know you’re dead.” –Tennessee Williams, in the London “Observer”, 1958.

“Despair is suffering without meaning.” –Viktor Frankl

“Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible of poverty.” –Mother Theresa

“Some of us will not see pain as a gift; some will always accuse God of being unfair for allowing it. But, the fact is, pain and suffering are here among us, and we need to respond in some way. The response Jesus gave was to bear the burdens of those he touched. To live in the world as his body, his emotional incarnation, we must follow his example.” –Philip Yancey, “Where Is God When It Hurts?”, p.325 (Zondervan; Walker revised Large-print edit., 1996)

“Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it.” –Helen Keller, “Optimism”

“You need not cry very loud; God is nearer to us than we think.”
–Brother Lawrence

Copyright 2000 by Kim Mills is a former pastor, now disabled by a very serious seizure disorder and brittle case of diabetes. His faith has been tried, as he lost his family and his flock, but God stood by with open arms. 

Kim Mills went home to be with the Lord on May 1, 2009. He will be greatly missed by his family and friends.

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest. (Exodus 33:14)

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. (Deuteronomy 31:8)

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. (Deuteronomy 33:27)

The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. (Psalm 9:9-10)

I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. (Psalm 16:8)

The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war rise up against me, yet I will be confident. (Psalm 27: 1, 3)

You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. (Psalm 32:7-8)

I sought the Lord, and He answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. (Psalm 34:4)

Those who seek the Lord lack no good thing. (Psalm 34:10b)

When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and rescues them from all their troubles. (Psalm 34:17)

Trust in the Lord and do good; so you will live in the land, and enjoy security. Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:3-5, 7a)

Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God. By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his son is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. (Psalm 42: 5,8)

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. (Psalm 46:1-3)

Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe. I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings. (Psalm 61:1-4)

My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:1-2)

You who live in the shelter of the Most High, who abide in the shadow of the Almighty, will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress; my God in whom I trust.” (Psalm 91:1-2)

Those who love me, I will deliver; I will protect those who know my name. When they call to me, I will answer them; I will be with them in trouble, I will rescue them and honor them. With long life I will satisfy them, and show them my salvation. (Psalm 91:14-16)

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. (Psalm 103:2-5)

Praise the Lord! Happy are those who fear the Lord. They are not afraid of evil tidings; their hearts are firm, secure in the Lord. Their hearts are steady, they will not be afraid. (Psalm 112: 1a, 7-8a)

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord guards the city, the guard keeps watch in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives sleep to his beloved. (Psalm 127:1-2)

When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted. (Psalm 138:3)

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139: 7, 9-10, 23-24)

The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them. (Psalm 145: 18-19)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run into it and are safe. (Proverbs 18:10)

Fear of others will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe. (Proverbs 29:25)

Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation. (Isaiah 12:2)

Those of steadfast mind you keep in peace—because they trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for in the Lord God you have an everlasting rock. (Isaiah 26: 3-4)

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength. (Isaiah 30:15)

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:28-31)

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)

Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord you God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. (Isaiah 43:1b-3a)

O Lord, my strength and my fortress, my refuge in time of distress. (Jeremiah 16:19)

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:13)

I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. (Jeremiah 31:3)

Ah Lord God! It is you who made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you. (Jeremiah 32:17)

See, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh; is anything too hard for me? (Jeremiah 32:27)

Your father knows what you need before you ask him. So do not worry, saying ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today’s trouble is enough for today. (Matthew 6:8b, 31-34)

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11: 28-31)

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten in God’s sight. But even the hairs of your head are all counted. Do not be afraid; you are of more value than many sparrows. (Luke 12:6-7)

Can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? If then you are not able to do so small a thing as that, why do you worry about the rest. (Luke 12:25-26)

Do not be afraid, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom. (Luke 12:32)

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 14:27)

Abide in me as I abide in you. Just as the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me. I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me you can do nothing. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask for whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. (John 15:4-5,7,10)

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)

If God is for us, who can be against us? Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8: 31b, 35, 37-39)

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. (Philippians 4:6-8)

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation . . . . I can do everything through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4: 12-13)

But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. (2 Thessalonians 3:3)

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:16)

Keep your lives free from the love of money, and be content with what you have; for he has said, ‘I will never leave you or forsake you.’ So we can say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can anyone do to me?’ (Hebrews 13: 5-6)

If any of you is lacking in wisdom, ask God, who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly, and it will be given you. But ask in faith, never doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. (James 1:5-6)

Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. Discipline yourselves, keep alert. Like a roaring lion your adversary the devil prowls around, looking for someone to devour. Resist him, steadfast in your faith . . . . And after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, support, strengthen, and establish you. (1 Peter 5: 7-10)

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. (1 John 4: 18-19)

Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. (Exodus 14:13a,14)

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest. (Exodus 33:14)

Be strong and bold; have no fear or dread of them, because it is the Lord your God who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. (Deuteronomy 31:6,8)

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. (Deuteronomy 33:27)

Be strong and courageous; do not be frightened or dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. (Joshua 1:9)

Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength. (Nehemiah 8:10b)

You will forget your misery; you will remember it as waters that have passed away. (Job 11:16)

By his light I walked through darkness. (Job 29:3)

I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety. (Psalm 4:8)

The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you. (Psalm 9:9-10)

I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. (Psalm 16:8)

You show me the path of life. In your presence there is fullness of joy; in your right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Psalm 16:11)

It is you who light my lamp; the Lord, my God, lights up my darkness. (Psalm 18:28)

The Lord is my light and my salvation — whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life — of whom shall I be afraid? Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident. One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock. (Psalm 27:1,3-5)

Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord! (Psalm 27:14)

You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. (Psalm 32:7-8)

I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. (Psalm 34:4)

The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them. (Psalm 34:7)

Those who seek the Lord lack no good thing. (Psalm 34:10b)

When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and rescues them from all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord rescues them from them all. (Psalm 34:17-19)

Trust in the Lord and do good; so you will live in the land, and enjoy security. Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:3-7a)

Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God. By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. (Psalm 42:5,8)

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. (Psalm 46:1-3)

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10a)

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. (Psalm 51:10-12)

Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe. I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings. (Psalm 61:1-4)

My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:1-2)

Be thou my strong habitation, whereunto I may continually resort: thou has given commandment to save me; for thou art my rock and my fortress. (Psalm 71:3; KJV)

Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. (Psalm 71:20)

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:26)

Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. They go from strength to strength, till each appears before God in Zion. (Psalm 84:5,7)

You who live in the shelter of the Most High, who abide in the shadow of the Almighty, will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress; my God in whom I trust.” You will not fear the terror of the night, or the arrow that flies by day, or the pestilence that stalks in darkness, or the destruction that wastes at noonday. Because you have made the Lord your refuge, the Most High your dwelling place, no evil shall befall you, no scourge come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. On their hands they will bear you up, so that you will not dash your foot against a stone. (Psalm 91:1-2,5-6,9-12)

Those who love me, I will deliver; I will protect those who know my name. When they call to me, I will answer them; I will be with them in trouble, I will rescue them and honor them. With long life I will satisfy them, and show them my salvation. (Psalm 91:14-16)

When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your love, O Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul. (Psalm 94:18-19)

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits –who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. (Psalm 103:2-5)

Praise the Lord! Happy are those who fear the Lord. They are not afraid of evil tidings; their hearts are firm, secure in the Lord. Their hearts are steady, they will not be afraid. (Psalm 112:1a,7-8a)

Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you. For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the Lord in the land of the living. (Psalm 116:7-9)

I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done. The Lord has chastened me severely, but he has not given me over to death. (Psalm 118:17-18)

My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word. (Psalm 119:28)

My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. (Psalm 119:50)

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord guards the city, the guard keeps watch in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives sleep to his beloved. (Psalm 127:1-2)

When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted. (Psalm 138:3)

Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me. (Psalm 138:7)

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:7,9-12,23-24)

My eyes are fixed on you, O Sovereign Lord; in you I take refuge–do not give me over to death. (Psalm 141:8)

The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them. (Psalm 145:18-19)

He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds. (Psalm 147:3)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. (Proverbs 3:24)

The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run into it and are safe. (Proverbs 18:10)

Fear of others will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe. (Proverbs 29:25)

Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation. (Isaiah 12:2)

Those of steadfast mind you keep in peace–because they trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for in the Lord God you have an everlasting rock. (Isaiah 26:3-4)

Lord, you establish peace for us; all that we have accomplished you have done for us. (Isaiah 26:12)

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength. (Isaiah 30:15)

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:21)

Say to those with fearful hearts, “Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you.” (Isaiah 35:4-5)

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:28-31)

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)

Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. (Isaiah 43:1b-3a)

As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you. (Isaiah 66:13a)

O Lord, my strength and my fortress, my refuge in time of distress. (Jeremiah 16:19a)

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” delares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.” (Jeremiah 29:11-14a)

I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. (Jeremiah 31:3)

Restrain your voice from weeping and your eyes from tears, for your work will be rewarded. (Jeremiah 31:16)

Ah Lord God! It is you who made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you. (Jeremiah 32:17)

See, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh; is anything too hard for me? (Jeremiah 32:27)

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. (Lamentations 3:22-26)

For the Lord will not reject forever. Although he causes grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not willingly afflict or grieve anyone. (Lamentations 3:31-32)

Do not rejoice over me, O my enemy; when I fall, I shall rise; when I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me. (Micah 7:8)

The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17)

Your father knows what you need before you ask him. Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? So do not worry, saying, “What shall we eat?” or “What shall we wear?” For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today’s trouble is enough for today. (Matthew 6:8b,25,31-34)

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-31)

If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, “move from here to there,” and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you. (Matthew 17:20)

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten in God’s sight. But even the hairs of your head are all counted. Do not be afraid; you are of more value than many sparrows. (Luke 12:6-7)

Can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? If then you are not able to do so small a thing as that, why do you worry about the rest? (Luke 12:25-26)

Do not be afraid, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom. (Luke 12:32)

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 14:27)

Abide in me as I abide in you. Just as the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me. I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me you can do nothing. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask for whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. (John 15:4-5,7,10)

If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will give life to your mortal bodies also through his Spirit that dwells in you. (Romans 8:11)

I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed to us. (Romans 8:18)

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)

If God is for us, who can be against us? Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:31b,35,37-39)

The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet. (Romans 16:20)

No testing has overtaken you that is not common to everyone. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength, but with the testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

For we were so utterly, unbearably crushed that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death so that we would rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He who rescued us from so deadly a peril will continue to rescue us; on him we have set our hope that he will rescue us again. (2 Corinthians 1:8b-10a)

But we have this treasure in clay jars, so that it may be made clear that this extraordinary power belongs to God and does not come from us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be made visible in our bodies. (2 Corinthians 4:7-10)

So we do not lose heart. Even though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day. For this slight momentary affliction is preparing us for an eternal weight of glory beyond all measure, because we look not at what can be seen but at what cannot be seen; for what can be seen is temporary, but what cannot be seen is eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)

So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everything has become new! (2 Corinthians 5:17)

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. (2 Corinthians 9:8)

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9a)

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. (Galatians 6:9)

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places. (Ephesians 1:3)

Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. (Philippians 4:6-8)

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:12a,13)

Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth, for you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life is revealed, then you also will be revealed with him in glory. (Colossians 3:2-4)

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts. (Colossians 3:15a)

But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. (2 Thessalonians 3:3)

Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. (2 Thessalonians 3:16)

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever. (2 Timothy 4:18)

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:15-16)

God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. (Hebrews 6:10)

Keep your lives free from the love of money, and be content with what you have; for he has said, “I will never leave you or forsake you.” So we can say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can anyone do to me?” (Hebrews 13:5-6)

If any of you is lacking in wisdom, ask God, who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly, and it will be given you. But ask in faith, never doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. (James 1:5-6)

Let those suffering in accordance with God’s will entrust themselves to a faithful Creator, while continuing to do good. (1 Peter 4:19)

Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. Discipline yourselves, keep alert. Like a roaring lion your adversary the devil prowls around, looking for someone to devour. Resist him, steadfast in your faith. And after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, support, strengthen, and establish you. (1 Peter 5:7-9a,10)

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. (1 John 4:18-19)

For everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God. (1 John 5:4-5)

This collection of Bible verses was compiled by Rebecca Groothuis. Rebecca is a writer and editor who struggles greatly with Fibromyalgia and other chronic illnesses. Scripture references taken from NIV and NRSV.

As a little girl, I had so many hopes and dreams with a heart and zest for life that seemed unstoppable! I quickly became a workaholic, as I often worked two jobs, attended classes, sang and danced in musicals, performed in choirs, modeled, rode my horse and lifted weights; I was definitely a workaholic!

When I was in college, I began getting symptoms of a neurological disorder. I often got “pins and needles” up and down my legs and spine. The pain and electricity was excruciating and my immune system had completely dismantled. Even so, I was not about to give up my active life and worked despite high fevers, bronchial pneumonia and vomiting.

I continued to pursue my acting and modeling career and had finally received a few offers that would be my “big break.” One day I was in the car listening to a Christian radio station when they were talking about seeking out our “images” and focusing on what others think of us. I had never been a conceited person; quite ironically, I was very insecure and thought I was ugly.

I had asked Jesus into my heart at the age of 14, but I really had not let Him be the King of my life. At this point, I was famished with anorexia and never did fit into the “cut throat” side of the industry. So, I began to pray about God’s will in my career decisions. Much to my amazement, the Lord proceeded to bombard me with songs and discussions on the radio that spoke to me as if He were giving me a direct answer, “No, Sherri. I do not want you to take these worldly jobs.”

Fortified with what I believed was God’s will, I wrote my agent a letter of resignation and nevefr  looked back. I then decided to give my talents to the purpose of the  Kingdom. I joined a Christian band and began writing Christian musicals. I went back to college and obtained a degree in Human Resource Management, as well as a degree in Christian Leadership. My thesis was on Drama and Music Ministry.

Shortly thereafter, while enduring another severe bout with pneumonia, I went to step out of bed and fell flat on my face. My left leg was completely asleep, as I could barely move it. Even so, I continued to drag myself into work and school, still battling pneumonia, because nothing was going to stop me!

Nevertheless, despite my utter determination, I continued to rapidly worsen until I could barely even sit up and was paralyzed from the ribs down. I was admitted to the hospital for tests and treatment for one week and released with a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis.

Honestly, I was not very frightened. God was truly carrying me through it all. I figured I would go home and rest for a few weeks then get back to work. After all, I had never let being sick get in the way before and I could still wheel into work and on stage, so the chair was not an issue for me.

Much to my dismay, a few weeks passed, then a few months and then a year. It was then discovered I also had Late-Chronic Lyme Disease from a tick bite when I was 14. I was still so sick, like I had the flu every single day. I had regained some of the feeling and use of my legs, but still could not stand or walk very far.

Many more years passed, as I lost my career, my dreams, my hobbies and most of my friends. Why, after I gave up huge opportunities for His ministry, had He taken that away as well? I had all the faith in the world that He could heal me and even had tried every medication, surgery, treatment and supplement I could try; but He kept saying, “No.” So, what purpose could He possible have for me in this state?

From the time I was first diagnosed with MS, I started writing in my journal here and there, regarding living with chronic illness. One day my husband, Wayne, came to me with an idea. He wanted to put some of these thoughts up on the internet, in order to educate our friends and family about my disability. Wow! How much easier that would be to ask someone to go to the website to read, rather than having to explain to everyone again and again!

Many believe that an impairment must be visible by the onlooker, in order to be real. On the contrary, many are limited by symptoms that are not always apparent from the outside like: extreme fatigue, pain, weakness, cognitive dysfunction, etc. In order to describe this situation of being disabled by these symptoms of illness and pain, I came up with the term, Invisible Disabilities and we named the site, The Invisible Disabilities Advocate (now the Invisible Disabilities Association).

Well, we had no idea what was about to happen with this seemingly insignificant website. Despite our narrow vision, God took this little fish and loaf of bread and multiplied it beyond belief! I never could have imagined that from my home, sprawled across my chair, with wrinkled pajamas and dirty hair, my thoughts could reach out to thousands of hurting people! But it did! We received countless e-mails and letters from others living with chronic conditions, spouses, siblings, physicians and other authors, telling us this book and website have changed their lives!

Soon, people started asking, “Where is God in all of this?” and “Why does He allow suffering?” Moreover, often believers tell those of us who live with debilitating conditions that they must not have enough faith, they should pray more or they must be hiding a sin. Some of these things can be true in some instances, but jumping to the conclusion that someone who lives with faith and trust in the Lord is ill as a result of their doing can be extremely hurtful. Because we were running into this so much and found out others were too, we began posting links to articles and some of our journal writings about faith and suffering. Where Is God Ministries was then born to help others find answers, truth and encouragement in their journey.

At any rate, the Lord is faithful to complete HIS work. After all, He is using me in a much mightier, more vital way than being on Broadway, in a magazine or on some commercial ever would have been! “I will turn all my mountains into roads, and my highways will be raised up” (Isaiah 49:11). Praise the Lord!

So, where does this leave the workaholic, ambitious, goal-oriented, Sherri? Although my body and mind will not cooperate, she still lives on inside me. This is a tremendous struggle, because I continue to mourn my business career and theatre ministry.

Not only that, it also grieves me to miss out on social activities, singing and having children. I even mourn the loss of being able to do things that everyone else resents and complains about like cleaning, cooking, shopping and running errands! Not an hour goes by that I don’t come up against things I can no longer do.

I will be honest- it is so very difficult to see everyone around me striving to “do it all,” when I am to the point that I would be happy with just “some of it.” Living with a disabling illness can be extremely challenging, isolating and frustrating.

People want to invite us over for dinner or out to a movie, but they are afraid to disturb us, which leaves us feeling lonely and abandoned. What is more, we need help, but we feel too guilty to ask because often people say they are just too busy.

When you pray for me, and for others in my situation, please do not just pray for healing; also pray for perseverance, joy and peace. We need God’s strength to endure the constant storm, until He decides to remove our pain.

I know without a doubt that our Lord can choose to repair this body at any time and I want that more than anyone will ever know! Thus, I will continue to earnestly hope and pray for healing. However, I have learned that true faith means believing that God knows best, even when He tells us “no.”

Proverbs says, “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight” (Proverbs 3:5 & 6). Therefore, although I hope and pray He heals me tomorrow, today I must seek His will in everything I do. When I am fixated on my will, I become depressed and miss out on the amazing work He is already doing through me… just as I am.

Copyright 2004 – Sherri Connell – Testimony of Her Life with Disability

As believers, we often wrestle with understanding how God can allow a person who worships Him to become ill, in pain or disabled. Unfortunately, often the first assumption we have about a believer with a continuing illness is that they must not have enough faith or they must be hiding a sin. Sadly, this can be devastating to those who love the Lord and who are actually living by the faith despite their circumstances that God wants us all to live.

This book explains our natural responses to those debilitated by chronic conditions and gives many examples of how to be a true encourager to our brothers and sisters in need! It is full of Scripture and quotes from physicians who specialize in chronic conditions. It is a must for all believers, church staff and ministry leaders!

Not By Sight: Ministering to Believers Living with Illness and Pain is based upon the knowledge learned by the true life experiences of Wayne and Sherri Connell, as well as countless others who live with debilitating conditions. All of her life, Sherri was an extremely active person who loved her careers, singing and dancing in musicals, riding her horse and lifting weights. In college, she studied Music Theater, then obtained 2 Bachelor Degrees in Business, with a Minor in Liberal Arts.

Although Sherri had enormous plans for her life, just as she was plotting out her Master’s Degree, she was stopped in her tracks at the age of 27. Starting with another winter bout of pneumonia, Sherri became paralyzed, so sick she could barely sit up and was in horrible pain. She was hospitalized and diagnosed with Progressive Multiple Sclerosis and Late-Chronic Lyme Disease. Suddenly, she went from “on the go” 24/7 to struggling just to get to a doctor’s appointment or take a shower.

Shortly after the onset of Sherri’s disability, to help her cope with her losses and un-welcomed changes, she began to write in her journal. Despite the seriousness of Sherri’s illness, people often had difficulty understanding how she could “look good” to them, even though she was very sick. Unfortunately, because of these misconceptions, people often jumped to the conclusion that she was just being lazy, unmotivated or was not trying hard enough. For a goal oriented, talented, career driven person like Sherri, these notions were absolutely devastating.

When Wayne realized there were so many other people around the world being hurt by the same lack of understanding that Sherri was experiencing, his passion quickly grew from being his wife’s supporter, to being an advocate for all who are living with disabilities. Thus, Wayne founded, Where Is God Ministries. He also compiled this booklet, Not By Sight, which contains excerpts from Sherri’s journal. WIGM distributes this book to give believers living with illness and pain a voice about how they feel, what they need and how others can be an encouragement!

Are you searching for God’s strength amidst chronic illness and pain? Do you find yourself asking why God allows suffering in this world? Do loved ones claim you must not have enough faith or there must be sin in your life?

Where Is God Ministries strives to help friends, family and churches better understand how to minister to those living with limitations due to chronic illness, pain, injury and disabilities. We offer informative articles, pamphlets, a booklet –Not By Sight, resources and stores and to help loved ones discover how to be a source of encouragement.